Remember my last post in SEPTEMBER? When I said, I feel gross and need to work out more? Don't worry. I haven't seen the gym since late August. That is right, I said AUGUST. I stopped caring. I figured working out and eating healthy was inconvenient.
How ungrateful of me. I should be treating this healthy, beautiful female body of mine like I appreciate it. I see so many people that aren't able to walk, or unable to do a full workout due do a disability. Yet, here I sit with a perfectly healthy body... and let it rot. While Cold Stone makes a fortune off of me.
I still don't really feel motivated to eat better, let alone work out. However, my body aches, I sleep like SHIZ, I don't have any energy during the day, and lets face it I don't feel good about myself. Oh, and all of my clothes are tight. It seems overwhelming when I think about the fact that I'll have to eat like a rabbit the rest of my life in order to avoid this feeling. Or, that I'll have to fake tan, get fake eyelash extensions, (already got the boobies part down) and become a typical gym rat that takes two hours to get ready for the gym, in order to get where I think I should be.
You see, it's just that. "Where I think I SHOULD be" is what gets me down. I look at others and think, that is going to take a LOT of work. And then I give up. Why do I have to be what others are? I don't. I know better. I need to get my mind frame back to this:
1. TRY-ing is better than nothing
2. It takes one second to make a good eating decision over a bad. The feeling afterwards is INCREDIBLE.
3. Sleep is my best friend, why am I not working out so I can get better sleep?
4. My boobs hate me when I work out, I need a SUPER sports bra.. anyone?
5. I don't have to be perfect, or skinny, just happy with myself. The inner confidence will shine brightly.
6. Getting in a routine is the most important. NO excuses.
7. It's not about my weight, it's about being toned, in shape, and happy!
8.You bet Dance Central counts as a workout at my house!
Time to get my flabby ass in gear. I got a golds pass... anyone go to the Spanish Fork Golds??
LOVE this. Dude...I struggle with the same shit! And it makes me mad. I was looking through old pictures of me...and in 2006, before I had Taysia, I was tiny. I weighed 125 and felt good about myself..and I didn't have to do shit to maintain it! But NOW....oooohohoho..Now, is a totally different story. After some trying times in my life, two C-Sections and two large babies later, I weigh the most I've EVER weighed. Now, with that said, I am trying to focus more on being fit, healthy, and feeling good...rather than a number I think I should weigh. It's tough. And I haven't done anything other than drink more water (still drinking sugar and caffeine). My body HURTS....and is SO TIGHT....and I feel SO tired and run down all the time. Somethings gotta give in this stubborn brain of mine.
ReplyDeleteAs someone who got up to 320 lbs at one point I can tell you that the biggest psychological issue I faced was worrying about what I would have to do in the future rather then what I needed to do right then. I would add up all the things I would eventually "have to do" and it seemed insurmountable, so I would quit (or never even start). Once I learned how to focus on the choices I was making at the moment I was making them everything turned around. All those tiny little choices added up to major changes.
ReplyDeleteThe other big breakthrough, for me at least, was making sure I had all my food made and with me for the day. Again, it seemed like it would be time consuming and difficult, but it ended up saving me a lot of time and money, and I lost a lot of weight because I was never hungry enough to make stupid split second choices (which would usually be used as an excuse to make even worse choices later in the day).
I think this is a problem a lot of people struggle with. There is a stand up comic who has a joke about this: "When I diet I make deals with myself. I say to myself, I'm going to eat this cheesrburger but later I will go to the gym. But later I don't go to the gym, instead I eat a cake."